Wife and Husband Go to Disco

A milf wife insisted that her husband took her to a disco. He explained that it was a stupid idea and he was not interested. She insisted until at some point he didn't endure and gave in. They went and enter the discotheque...
- Good morning, Mr Henry! - a porter greets them.
The milf wife is slightly surprised. They enter the room. A waiter runs up immediately to them.
- For Mr the table as usually?
The milf wife is even more surprised. The husband explains her that they probably confuse him with someone. The waiter asks:
- For Mr the drink as usually? And for a lady?
The milf wife is almost furious. In the background is the show. A stripper aims to take off the last part of her clothing and asks who will help her.
- Henry! Henry! - people in the room chant.
The furious milf wife runs out of the pub. The husband runs out too. They call a taxi and go home. She reproaches the husband all the way. At some point a taxi driver turns his head and says:
- Mr Henry, we haven't had so cheeky yet!

Lawyers Traveled by Train

Three milf lawyers and three engineers traveled by train to a conference. The milf lawyers bought three tickets. In contrast the engineers bought only one ticket.
- How can three people travel with one ticket? - one of the lawyers asked.
- You'll see - one of the engineers answered.

Everyone got into the train. Milf lawyers took seats. Three engineers took a sleeping room. When a conductor came he asked milf lawyers for the tickets. Then knocked into the room occupied by the engineers. A door opened and one hand with the ticket appeared. The conductor checked it and went away. Milf lawyers argued that it was a good idea.

After the conference the milf lawyers copied engineers and in this way saved a little money. When they arrived at the railway station bought one ticket. To their surprise the engineers did not buy any ticket at this time.
- How do you intend to travel without a ticket? - one of the milf lawyers asked.
- Watch and learn - one engineer said.

When the train arrived the milf lawyers took one of the sleeping rooms. Engineers took a room beside the bedroom. When the train started one of the engineers went to the room with milf lawyers. He knocked and said:
- A ticket to check please!

CIA Was Recruiting Killers

CIA was recruiting killers. After all exams and tests remaining three candidates (two men and one milf woman). Now it's time for the final test. Agent took first men inside a room with a big metal door. Handed him a gun and said:
- We must be sure that you will carry out our instructions under any circumstances. Your wife is sitting inside this room. You have to kill her.
- You can not talk seriously. I can't hurt my wife - the candidate said.
- So you are not suitable for this works - the agent replied.
The second men got the same instructions. Grabbed the gun and entered the room. There was silence. After five minutes he went out and said with tears in his eyes:
- I can not kill my wife.
- You are not suitable. Take your wife and return home.
Now it's time for the milf woman. They told her only that her husband must die. The milf woman grabbed the gun and entered the room. They heard shots. After a while they heard the scream and loud bangs. After several minutes was very quiet. The door opened and there appeared the milf woman. Wiped a sweat from her face and said:
- You didn't tell me, guys, that you loaded blind bullets to this gun. I had to kill him using a chair.

Lawyer Called Witness

A lawyer in a small town called as a witness an older milf woman. He asked that she sat and said:
- Mrs. Jones, Do you know me?
The milf woman replied:
- I know you, Mr Williams. I know the Lord, since you were a small boy. Unfortunately you become a big disappointment for me. You lies, cheats on your wife, manipulates people and backbites them. Yes, I know you. - Milf ended.
The lawyer grew dumb. Did not know what to do so he asked sharply:
- Mrs. Jones, Do you know accused's defender?
- Yes, I know him. - Milf replied. - I know Mr. Bradley since was a little boy. I was his patron. And he disappointed me too. He is lazy, intolerant and abuses alcohol. He is not able to maintain normal relationships. Yes, I know him. - Milf ended.
At this point the judge asked people in room for silence and called both lawyers. Speaking very softly he threatened them:
- If any of you ask this woman whether she knows me I will punish you!

Almost Totally Blind Woman

In one city lived the milf woman who was almost totally blind. She had three sons who wanted to prove which is the best for her.

The first son bought a residence with 15 rooms. He believed that this is the best thing that any of them could offer her.

The second son bought a limousine and rented some chauffeur. He believed that in this way he will gain her approval.

The third son wanted to be original. He bought a parrot and planned to train her for many years to remember the entire Bible. The milf mother could ask the bird for any line and the parrot could recite it word after word.

The milf woman called the first of her sons and said:
- My son, this house is great. But it is too big for me. I live in one room. The residence is too big to be clean and care for it. I do not really need this new house but thank you that wanted to take care of me.

Then Milf stood in front of the other and said:
- My son, the car is beautiful. But I can not drive and do not want to be transported by the chauffeur.

Then Milf came up to the third of the sons and said:
- Son, I want to thank you for your concern. This chicken was delicious.

Christmas Tree Tradition

It happened a long time ago. Santa Claus was preparing an annual journey but at each step he faced problems. Four of his milf elves were sick and the other milf elves did not produce toys as fast as was necessary. Santa Claus was nervous that will not manage to do it on time.

When he went to harness reindeer noticed that three of them are pregnant and two jumped the fence and escaped somewhere. When he began to load the sleigh a board cracked and a toy bag fell to the ground and the content spilled out.

Frustrated Santa Claus came to the cottage to drink a coffee and something more powerful. When he approached the kitchen cabinet noticed that the milf elves hid his liqueur. Even more frustrated dropped a cup of coffee which crashed into hundreds of pieces. He went to take the broom and found that the mouse ate straw which was made.

Suddenly the door bell called and Santa Claus cursed violently. When he opened the door saw a small milf angel with some great Christmas tree. The milf angel said happily:
- Merry Christmas, St. Nicholas. Is not a lovely day? I have a beautiful Christmas tree for you. Is not this tree beautiful? What would you like me to do with it?

In this way arose the tradition placing some small milf angel on the top of the Christmas tree.

Very Religious Woman

A very religious woman named Milf lived near the river. One day the river poured from the trough and covered the entire city. Milf went home on the roof of the building. When so sitting some boat swam up and some guy offered to take her.
- There is no need - replied Milf. - God will take care of me.
And when guy heard this he swam away. Meanwhile the water level rose. Another boat swam up and the owner suggested that will take her.
- There is no need - replied Milf. - God will take care of me.
Again the boat swam away and the water level rose so that Milf had to enter the chimney. To the home of Milf flew up a helicopter and a woman inside has proposed that she will take her.
- There is no need - replied Milf.
- Are you sure? - Asked the woman.
- Yes, I am sure. God will take care of me.
The helicopter flew away and the water level rose so that the house was completely flooded. Milf drowned and went to heaven. In heaven she met face to face with God.
- You said that you will take care of me. What happened? - Milf asked.
- I sent you two boats and a helicopter. What else do you expect from me? - said God.